The Dirt - Whose wiener is this anyways?

Its pretty much a VH1 Behind The Music episode but with a lot more naked chicks.

Look, if you like Motley Crue (insert the umlauts on your own, bub) good for you. I'm not here to bash your taste in music. I think they have some ok jams and some terrible ones as well but that can be said about anyone (including The Beatles and Led Zeppelin) so enjoy your cassette tape of Decade of Decadence and rock on. This however is a podcast about bad movies and so this whole thing will be about the movie. And this movie sucks.

My problem with The Dirt is that its not a movie. There's no plot. There's no character journey. They start out as "fucking idiots" and end as "fucking idiots". "Well, its a biography pic", you might argue. "Sometimes people don't have any character arcs because they aren't characters, they are people." Ok, good argument. Except...

It isn't a damn biography. They movie even comes right out and says its all bullshit (delivered by Iwan Rheon's Mick Mars). Which is fine...if you're sitting around talking rock folklore with a dude wearing a Motorhead (stop it with the umlauts, dammit!) t-shirt. But this is outright revisionist history and by declaring some of it is bullshit so that it looks like a movie makes ALL of it bullshit and then what's the point of it anyways?

I'll tell you what. A celebration of infantile misogyny and entitlement. This is a man-boy jerk-off fantasy. "Wow, look at those guys shit on everyone they ever met and smack women around. Sure wish I could do that." said a future election denying mom's basement dweller. I'm over the romanticizing of hair metal excessiveness. None of it should be looked on fondly or celebrated. They were shitty people then and they are shitty people now.

Watch if you like excessive nudity though. I could use my time better though.