Stinker Madness - The Podcast for Bad Movie Lovers

Blood Freak

This episode of the podcast centers around the classic Thanksgiving film from 1972, Blood Freak. Its that old tale of a man who smokes a little pot, eats an entire turkey and those goes on a tryptophan fueled and murderous rampage by becoming a freaking turkey. Yep. That's it.
Blood Freak is freaking insane and one of the worst movies ever made. The production values are incredibly poor with poor lighting, out of focus shots, terrible set design and horrible acting. It's right in line with films like Eegah!, Monster A Go-Go, The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies, or anything starring Tor Johnson. How this managed to get past the MST3K crew is a mystery deeper than where the hell is Amelia Earhardt.
As its sooooo bad, it's super super super fun. Its so riffable as it is terribly paced and stuffed with ridiculous scenarios and dialogue. At one point, the main turkey's fresh girlfriend and apparent fiance finds that her love is now a turkey head guy but decides to have sex with him anyways. Add in the entire films premise and you've got a must see on your hands.
The bizarreness never stops and gets going immediately with the director coming on screen and delivering a narrative moral explaination of "the events you are about to witness" and then takes a big drag on his cigarette mid-sentence. It should also be mentioned that he's reading his lines from a piece of paper and he can't even do that well. This happens about 5 more times throughout the film and each time is hilarious with the end lecture being a showcase of unintentional comedy. Wow.
The sheer lunacy of the film is the big draw but the combo of terrible acting and hilarity via both the mistakes made on camera and the riffs coming that even someone unfamiliar with riffing a film (say your dog or your grandma) make this an absolute must do of fans of the worst of the worst. Very underrated stinker.

Prelude to Blood Freak

In early preparation for Thanksgiving, Jackie gets a headstart with pulling the trigger on a turkey of a movie from 1972, 3 weeks early. But that's OK because it's a spooky tale about a motorcycle guy who smokes some pot and gets turned into a murderous turkey. Just like your family.
Special Segment - Films we've seen the most in a given period of time
Jackie - Care Bears Movie, The Beastmaster, Love Actually
Justin - Condorman, Batman, Fight Club
Sam - Rambo II, Encino Man, The A-Team, Children of Men
The Wild Card - Who Would Win in a Knife Fight
A Thanksgiving Turkey vs The Easter Bunny

Order of the Black Eagle

Duncan Jax and his faithful companion, Boon are back to take down a group of Nazis living in South America from accomplishing their dubious evil plans, mostly having a functioning laser and unfreezing their cryogenic leader, Ze Furor. Yes that one.
Let's get right out there and say that Order of the Black Eagle and Unmasking the Idol are two of the funnest films we've had the pleasure of discussing on this show. They REALLY need to be re-release as a dual pack on Blu-Ray. As much fun as we had with the first one we may have had more fun with the second. These are fantastic.
Ian Hunter is once again dialing up the charm and pizzazz to 50. He's not quite as eye-flaring as he was in the first one but he's just as goofy and wonderful. Boon has a reduced role but when he's there, whoa boy. He's epic.
The majority of this film is getting to business. While the last one has a lot more dialogue this one has a lot more action. Both are equally awesome and ridiculous but this one is more packed from start to finish, with emphasis on the finish. Duncan teams up with a team of mercenaries (each with unique skill set and personality) and then things really fly off the handle.
There's a ton of incredibly dangerous stunts again. Lots of bad landings and exploded stuntmen. I can't imagine there weren't a plethora of injuries after this one.
This film may have "more" in it than most films. It's really got everything (except nudity) but let me just toss a couple spoilers - Hitler cake, Baboon Tank, hovercrafts, missiles, cat-burglarizing, huge guns, deadly poker games, a man-chucking man, dirt-bike hot-dogging, 
So much fun and so much shenanigans that the Duncan Jax duology should not be missed. We all love these films.

Prelude to Order of the Black Eagle

This week on the podcast Sam follows up the first Duncan Jax movie with what may or may not be the sequel to Unmasking the Idol. This time Duncan's going to take down a bunch of Nazis who happen to have a little special guest on their hands.
Movies Discussed
Shin Gojira
A Tribute to Hastings, Your Entertainment Superstore
Jackie shares tales of working there, Sam tells us about a little known side-effect of shopping there, and Justin remembers finding Pieces, America 3000 and the biggest piece of crap ever, Vampire Vixens from Venus.
The Wild Card - Good Neighbor, Bad Neighbor
Duncan Jax
Star
Baron Goldtooth

Condorman - the fondue of Disney films

Disney bungles a live-action version of a cartoon with the least believable action star that has ever delved into the spy/superhero game. But add one of the raddest car chases, laser turret boats, rocket powered zip lines, and the worst costume you've ever seen and you've got one of the best early 80's turds to ever grace the screen. Wahoo!
The movie follows Woody who is the graphic artist behind the Condorman comic book frachise. Woody foolishly stumbles into a Soviet defection mission for the CIA and must employ the skills of his creation to help the beautiful and mysterious Natalia escape from the villainous Krakov and his right hand man, Morovitch and his team of skilled killers. You can use that if you'd like IMDB.
Michael Crawford's Woody is seriously one of the strangest casting decisions. Yes he's goofy and bumbling but at the same point is completely devoid of charm. Yet he's so unlikable that he becomes likable. It also seems like they gave him teeth extensions and raised the octave of his voice by a factor of 2. The rest of the cast does a fine job including a clearly drunk Oliver Reed.
The car sequence is the reason everyone shows up to this film though. While the Condormobile may be incalculably stupid looking, the things this car can do...whew. The sequence is so rad that we all truly believe that The Fast and the Furious used it as inspiration for Dom's team of skilled driver, bad guys. Come for the goofy, stay for the car chase.
In the end, there is no way that Condorman could have been successful. It is just too goofy. But its beautiful in its likability. It's a fairly safe bet and a great film to share with your children when its time. We love it.

Prelude to Condorman

Back in 1981, Disney tried to gift the world with a live-action version of a comic-book character, and failed miserably. But their mistake is our great reward as Condorman sweeps through the show. We are giddy with excitement.
Streaming Do's and Don'ts
Death Wish II - EPIX
Death Wish III - TUBITV
Troll - EPIX and Prime
The Wild Card - The Great Superpower Debate
Emo-Man - You gain powers based on your emotional state, ie angry you get hulky, peaceful you get zenlike, sad you can shoot water out your eyes, horny you get smelly genitals....

American Ninja 2: Attack of the Ninja Clones

Michael J. Dudikoff and Steve James are back from American Ninja and this time the volume of ninja gets ramped up to ludicrous levels. How do you get so many ninja? Well you just build an evil clone army of them so you can be a drug kingpin. What? Yep.
In another instance of Golan and Globus having very little understanding of the ninja, we also have very little understanding of their understanding. When you can clone ninja, what do you do with the ninja you've cloned? Well you become the kingpin of drugs. So why do you need ninja? Are they couriers? Are they drug dealers? Are they guards? Why not just have guys with guns? And why are your cloned ninja so inept? The plot is quite dumb.
Dudikoff is back and we're all too happy to see him. However, due to no fault of his own, he's not quite the same Pvt. Joe Armstrong from the first film. We really missed the unnecessary and out of place James Dean poses. He's a little less featured in this one, the stars are the ninja. However, we do give props for the incredibly tight pants that inspired the cinematographer to focus the viewers attention on a bulbous package. Ridiculous.
Steve James doesn't even bother waiting to get his shirt off and pretty much doesn't bother with clothes for the majority of this film. He fights a ton of ninja on his own and suddenly possesses very unusual weapons to dispatch them. Hilarious.
The stunts are incredibly dangerous and  many many men clearly get injured in horrific manners in the filming of this movie. There is a couple of extremely excellent action sequences (the beach fight, the ninja vs truck sequence, and the bar fight) that are top notch and make this film worth watching just for them. Forget all the other elements; these sequences are fantastic.
With that in mind though, we didn't feel that American Ninja 2: The Confrontation is quite the same film as American Ninja. Yes there is a few sequences that are exceptional but there are also some very stale jokes and the final showdown pales in comparison to the final showdown in the first film. There is also less Dudikoff being a jackass and Charlie #2 needs more screen-time. Its a classic stinker but saying that it is the centerpiece of the franchise is a mistake.

Prelude to American Ninja 2: The Confrontation

It's time to finish off our Ninja-threepeat with a follow up to our American Ninja episode in which Michael Dudikoff dons the role of Pvt. Joe Armstrong, teams up with Curtis Jackson and fights hordes and hordes of random ninja.
Streaming Do's and Don'ts
The Wave - Netflix
Knock Knock - Amazon Prime
Malibu Beach - Amazon Prime
Wild Card - Who'd win in a Knife Fight?
Hillary Clinton vs Donald Trump

Unmasking the Idol - Like a golden Buddha filled with pirate treasure

Worth Keeter's first Duncan Jax film is one of the film-world's must undiscovered gems. It's a glorious romp of all things awesome. If you like any fun film ever, then Unmasking the Idol is right up you're alley. It's banana's in the best manner.
Somehow Unmasking the Idol has gone under the radar since its debut 30 years ago. Only 88 user ratings exist on IMDB (including the rating we gave). Host of Stinker Madness, Justin, has it as his 10th favorite bad movie of all time. That is enough right there to have this movie have at least 100 user ratings on IMDB.
Unmasking the Idol is one of our "Stop what you are doing and go watch this film" movies. It's truly a gift and no fan of Stinker Madness should miss this film. As of this writing it is streaming on Amazon Prime so do yourself a favor and watch this now: 

Prelude to Unmasking the Idol

A little known film from 1986 that features untold amounts of ninjas, treasure, espionage, ninjas, 3-wheeler's, a baboon, a bad-ass Ford Ranger, and so many balloons comes to the show. This is one movie you won't want to miss.
Streaming Do's and Don'ts
The 5th Wave - Starz
London Has Fallen - Netflix
The Wild Card - Who Wins in a Knife Fight
Boon (Unmasking the Idol) vs. Clyde (Every Which Way But Loose)