Stinker Madness - The Podcast for Bad Movie Lovers

Jem and the Holograms - Nice Moral, Bad Delivery

In October of 2015, Jem and the Holograms was released into US theaters with much fanfare, and by fanfare I mean people asking "They remade Jem? Well that was dumb..." and then one week later it was nowhere to be found, instantly making it a SMABFA contender. Whose idea was this anyways?
The problem with Jem is the moral gets completely lost in the presentation. Sure, the plot is stupid. Sure, acting is not so good. Sure, the hunky boy is a total douche with the obligatory shirtless scene. These problems can be managed. The problem with Jem is the constant use of YouTube videos of other real life teenagers "practicing" music intercut into dialogue and montages. They are a hideous distraction and painfully annoying. Just what this film needs, more Internetting....blech.
Individual Ratings:
Over the top action:Cheesy effects:Horrendous acting:Laugh-out-loud-ability:Ridiculous stunts:Gratuitous nudity:Memorable one-liners:
Overall Ratings:
Good Movie Quality: Bad Movie Quality:

Prelude to Jem and the Holograms

This week we finish off the last of our 2015 SMABFA contenders with the remake of Jackie's favorite 80's band of cartoon ladies. Could Jem and the Holograms preserve the cheese of the original cartoon or will they try to modernize it, making it completely boring?
Jackie's Movie Call Cast List
What animal do you bring to a open call casting so that the producer chooses you. What?!?!
Get ready for the SMABFAs! They are coming out next week! Check for updates here.

Starship Troopers - Verhoeven's Opus

Paul Verhoeven had a vision for a caricature of a Facist future society and totally nails it in the guise of a silly space battle movie. Toss in a 3 way love story with incredibly strong and easy to care for characters, exceptional acting and you've got one of hell of a good movie.
Why then is this movie on Stinker Madness? Well because in 1997 the critics and Sam and Justin made a single mistake; they didn't get this movie. The world wasn't ready for Starship Troopers. We were expecting a film adaptation of the Robert Heinlein science fiction novel of the same title. We weren't expecting a high school football game with backflips. We weren't expecting children smashing beetles and mothers laughing maniacally at it. We weren't expecting Robocop and Total Recall with a serious story and moral statement. So it was panned by critics. Thus making it a "bad movie". But it truly is a masterpiece in pop culture.
Starship Troopers has all the staples of a great bad movie. It's packed with action, its fast paced, its morbidly hilarious and the practical effects are gory and top notch. But the acting, story and masterful direction make the film a good movie packaged as a bad one. We applaud you, Verhoeven. This film is a masterpiece and should be viewed by everyone.
Individual Ratings:
Over the top action:Cheesy effects:Horrendous acting:Laugh-out-loud-ability:Ridiculous stunts:Gratuitous nudity:Memorable one-liners:
Overall Ratings:
Good Movie Quality: Bad Movie Quality:

Prelude to Starship Troopers

With this episode of the famed Stinker Madness Podcast we prepare for 1997's Starship Troopers from master of stuff, Paul Verhoeven. Despite having a solid IMDB user rating, the critics panned it. Does Johnny Rico get better with age? Can Denise Richards be more than just walking boobs? IS the only good bug a dead bug?
Streaming Do's and Don'ts
The Runner - Netflix
Pop Quiz, Hot Shot? - How do they do drugs in film?
Sniffing cocaine - powdered lactose
Heroin cooking - sugar & baking soda
Smoking weed - Wizard Weed - weed with no THC. Same things cops use when they go undercover.
Crack rocks - Rock candy OR glue and baking soda
Needle injections - prosthetic arms, trick needles, OR for budget movies - stunt guy just frickin' does it.
The Great Superpower Debate
Face freezing power - 2.5/10

Point Break (1991) - Gimme Dominic and Brian any day

For 25 years, people have been celebrating a film about a FBI guy spending 3/4 of the movie trying to get fired and perhaps sent to prison, while steadily falling in love with a dude brah. Since its release apparently no one has watched it because this crap stinks and not in good ways.
There's quite a few more problems with the film including the casting of Lori Petty, how Patrick Swayze looks (he looks like an insane homeless person, he does NOT look cool), the extended "way too much information" dialogue between strangers, so much damn slo-motion, characters make choices that conflict with their entire idiom, there's shots of people/things that are there just to look cool and not to contribute to the story.
Point Break is just a 5/10. Stop it with your nostalgia for this film. Put aside your 13 year old boy love for Bodhi and Johnny Utah.
Individual Ratings:
Over the top action:Cheesy effects:Horrendous acting:Laugh-out-loud-ability:Ridiculous stunts:Gratuitous nudity:Memorable one-liners:
Overall Ratings:
Good Movie Quality: Bad Movie Quality:

Prelude to Point Break (1991)

Johnny Utah finally graces our presence in Kathryn Bigelow's second appearance on the show. Can it POSSIBLY be a good movie? Can it be a bad movie that everyone thinks is good? Or is it just the same as her Near Dark and just meh? Least Busey is in it.
Streaming Do's and Don'ts
Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life - Netflix (No longer available)
The Thaw - Amazon Prime
The Brain that Wouldn't Die - (with MST3K) - YouTube
Darkman - Netflix
The Great Superpower Debate
Telekinesis limited to 8 ft range and 40 lbs. - 6.5 stars

Point Break (2015)

For years people have been requesting a remake of a really stupid and poorly thought out 90's movie with horrendous acting and too many "dude bros" and then make it much much stupider. Wait...no one asked for that? Then wait the hell is the point of Point Break (2015)?
The story of 2015's Point Break is truly one of the more poorly thought plots in recent memory. Johnny Utah must go undercover into some extreme guys again and to do it he must also do extreme stuff to build up their trust. There the plot similarity ends. The real dumb stuff is the motivation of Bodhi and his crew. They are going to save the Earth (environmentally, ie. "Mans progress is totally harshing my groove, bro" crap)...by doing 8 extreme sport/stunts. Yup. Save the Earth by jumping off stuff. Now one can argue that they are environmental terrorists who are going to stop corporations from damaging the Earth by extreme criminality but at no point would any of their stunts do that, one, in fact, damages the Earth more than the activity they are preventing and then halfway through the movie, they just give up on that completely and just do extreme sports so, as Bodhi puts it, "become one with the Earth". If only "becoming one with the Earth" meant splattering into the side of it at terminal velocity.
The story is the only fun bad thing in it. Its absolutely not worth viewing by anyone as it rides in that black hole of "not good" and "not very bad" that films fall into. Maybe its worth viewing if you have the flu and are hopped up on NyQuil...
Individual Ratings:
Over the top action:Cheesy effects:Horrendous acting:Laugh-out-loud-ability:Ridiculous stunts:Gratuitous nudity:Memorable one-liners:
Overall Ratings:
Good Movie Quality: Bad Movie Quality:

Sssssss - The S is silent

In what very well may be the worst mad scientist plan of all time, Professor Stoner (didn't make that up) turns innocent David from Man to Snakeman to.....well mongoose lunch. It's ssssssso ssssssstupid! It should be mentioned that no other film on this podcast is as worthy of being a MST3K episode.
The film is not a fantastically fun time. There's periods of nothing happening and just shots of snakes and/or montages of David suffering from his condition. In truth there is only about 15 minutes worth of plot in this movie, but the end is so incredibly ssssssstupid that it can't be missed.
Individual Ratings:
Over the top action:Cheesy effects:Horrendous acting:Laugh-out-loud-ability:Ridiculous stunts:Gratuitous nudity:Memorable one-liners:
Overall Ratings:
Good Movie Quality: Bad Movie Quality:

Prelude to Sssssss

This week Justin rolls the dice on maybe the worst movie title of all time. Seriously, try to tell your friends your watching Sssssss and listen how it comes out of your mouth. Onomatopoeia should never be used in film titles. But we think its about snake men...
Streaming Do's and Don'ts
Moonraker - Hulu Plus
The Living Daylights - Hulu Plus
Tomorrow Never Dies - Hulu Plus
The Greatest Super Power Debate
Fish Man - 6.5 stars

The Apple - So God Drives a Bentley?

In the year 1994, disco has become such a force in culture that record producers can rule the government forcing the citizens of Earth to face prison time and social rejection if they are not down with "BIM"...we still aren't sure what BIM is but apparently you must be down with it. However, we are not.
This movie stinks! Wow is this not how you make a movie and its such a mess that it becomes a spectacle. Normally, movies that predict the future are pretty off in their predictions of how we live but this one is WAAAAYYYY off. I don't remember glam in 1994's music. Maybe I misses something but I don't remember flannel having alot of glitter on it. But this film just can't believe that disco and "The Bay City Rollers" weren't going to rule music.
However, the film is such a total disaster that there is a level of fun to it. The other primary bonus is that the film is short. You're not stuck in misery for way too long. There is only a few moments of pain that you must suffer from such as songs that run on too long and are crap to get to all of the good stuff. Without spoilers the ending is well worth the crappy parts to get to. Its not a great bad movie but its good enough for a viewing.
Individual Ratings:
Over the top action:Cheesy effects:Horrendous acting:Laugh-out-loud-ability:Ridiculous stunts:Gratuitous nudity:Memorable one-liners:
Overall Ratings:
Good Movie Quality: Bad Movie Quality: